Oh Lampoons

I knew I was a psychotic menopausal cunt when I was 13. I was proud to be not able to ever menstruate properly and control my angerand I was proud to have a dysfunctional vagina. I went around by myself inschool and I  twiddled with clitoris because I no longer lubricated properly. No one would hang around me, but at least I orgasmed twice a day.

The girls  locker rooms are full of menstruating young girls these days. They lack the hardcore attitude that makes me the  Superior. Diving into the lowest forms of postmodern decadence, they fluff around like the bleeding  machines of teenagedom! They are fluffing my pride away from my vagina! I no longer have a reason to be proud have a dysfunctional reasoning faculty and vagina when the young teen girls complain about their periods! The Bleeding Unterfrauen have threatened my menopausal power and it now time to declare war against the Bleeding Unterfrauen.

They are  the blood sisters of a new human race. Bleeding vagina, hair braiding. hardcore breeders. They are the soil of a new tampon and Maxi pad filled nation. Get out of the way you bleeding cunts, you’re just jealous of my cunt. I am not interested in how heavy your flow was. I don’t want to know when your periods sync up!  I  care about hardcore  power rubbing my clitoris to orgasmic bliss.  Vibrator power. Get away from me with your disgusting outfits that ride up your ass and show your perfect little taints.  I bet they are organic in the non-Evolian sense of the word. You fucking perfect pussied bitches.

The Dysfunctional Vagina Bearer is a fearless femdom who is not interested in the boys and their social causes. The Dysfunctional Vagina Bearer knows that might makes right. I need to show the Bleeding Unterfrauen what it truly means to be the Dysfunctional Vagina Bearer.

I need to form a new resistance of Dysfunctional Vagina Bearers. Fighting the Bleeding Unterfrauen, I will take back my pride and destroy these inferior bleeding bitches at hair  parties. I do not like Bleeding Unterfrauen. I do not like bloody cunts. It is time for me to take a cue from my menopausal Grandma. I must stand together as the Dysfunctional Vagina Bearer, the taint  of glory and non-lubrication, and the taint without the  stench of week old blood.

Blood =Period Bitch

The Bleeding Unterfrauen are not proud to be gay. They are proud to be fabulous. What is fabulous about a bunch of bleeders who think glitter is so ever-so-awesome? If you answered “nothing” you may be a Dysfunctional Vagina Bearer.

Icall on the Dysfunctional Vagina Bearers to stop associating with the Bleeding Unterfrauen. It is only us, the Dysfunctonal Vagina Bearers, who understand the true meaning of normative female physiology. Bleeding culture is Impure Vagina. It is bleedist, festering,  vaginatarianism.

Tonight we rise our swords in honor of the Dysfunctional Vagina Bearers. We call for war against the Bleeding Unterfrauen.

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